If you don't want to read about people venting, ranting or whatever....just don't bother. Simple as that. I just felt the need to post something for the hell of it cause I am going through a lot of shit and I just like to say what's up......
So a lot of crap is going on in my life and a lot of people already know about it and all. But it just keeps building and building up and just WON'T stop!
So most of you already know that I lost my dad almost 4 years ago do to a motorcycle accident. If you didn't here about it he was hit by a lady driving her car and she ended up hitting my dad and luckily there was an ambulance 4 cars back. So my dad got to the hospital in Dubuque in about 4 min. mind i tell you he was on vacation and all that's why he was in Dubuque. So that was a good fact there, the fact that the ambulance was there. So my dad wasn't there at the hospital that long till he passed away cause most of his injuries were internal bleeding. Till this day I am not 100% certian if he felt the pain or not. But from what I have heard he was knocked out cold and hard enough that he slipped into an acoma. But he wasn't in it for that long cause he ended up passing away. Then I was an idiot and tried going to school the next day....RETARD, I wasn't there for long at ALL! I never got to say goodbye to my dad, and that's another one of the things that absolutely KILLS me to this day. A lot of people loved my dad because he had a lot of love and passion for others and helped everyone and was there for everyone. He was an absolute AWESOME guy! The BEST dad I could EVER ask for. And NOBODY in their right mind will EVER be able to replace my daddy! I miss him SO much nobody can really understand unless they have loss a parent. A lot of people are like "oh I know how you feel" HELL IF YOU DO! You might if you have lost a parent but if you lost someone else that is a totally DIFFERENT feeling and trust me it IS. I have lost a lot of people in my life it is undescribable.
With the whole situation of my dad, he never got around to making a will. So I am having to go through all of this mess. My step-mom being a greedy ass little bitch also. We've gone to two mediations, mind I tell you those are things where we can settle(for money with the insurance company) and not have to go to trial, and BOTH times we didn't settle because of my step-mom. Reason being is because she's greedy and can't take the money they offer. Obviously it's greed because she isn't willing to settle for this amount of money and have it done and over with and ALSO money can NEVER replace someone and I would be happy w/o the money actually. But that is the way that the law is. She also ended up stealing ALL of my college money my dad had been saving up for a LONG time and the college money that people gave to me at the visitation and the funeral because there was a memorial fund set up for me there. Then we are trying to remove her from being incharge of the estate because I do NOT trust her being in charge of my money after all of that. But this topic just keeps going and going.......
With all of that I have to deal with guys also. I've been through a lot in my years of being alive and just in a few years also. I was in a relationship, mind I tell you I NEVER will regret, with the most WONDERFUL guy ever! He treated me with the utt most respect for me ever. I had NEVER in my life met a guy as sweet and kinda and caring as he was. I thought that I had found the guy of my dreams. He seemed SO perfect to me in my eyes. He was ALWAYS there for me and if I needed someone to talk to he was there for me. He told me he loved me and ment it because when he would say it he would look straight into my eyes and say it and I could FEEL that he meant it. I thought this relationship was going to last and last a LONG time. There are SO many more things I could get into about how wonderful he was but I'll stop. But out of all of that wonderfullness is also the bad side of someone. Finding out that he was with another girl a couple times. When I heard that I was TORN into pieces. To know that the guy I am in LOVE with just cheated on me. It is the most hurtful thing you could feel. To know that the one guy that you gave the most you could towards him, everything and anything you could to him. To have him turn around and bite you in the ass. I'm still hurting from that whole situation and that happened in August. And to top ALL of that off that girl is pregnant and about 6 or so months along and the kid MIGHT be his, don't know yet. AND he is dating and living with her on top of it all too. I still love the guy and I can't help it. I wish that things were different but they aren't and that's how life goes I guess. Then now he's mad at me and wont talk to me cause I some rediculus things and one thing I take fault for but he was getting over it and then got mad at me for another thing that I don't even understand why he is able to be mad at me for it and I can't be mad at him for certain things........it's all too confusing =/
I'm starting to find out who my true friends are too. It's hard to trust people these days because people can be your "best friend" and turn around and hurt you SO bad you would have NEVER guessed they would have done something like that to you.
But I am done. If you read all of that I would be amazed...
A topic for anyone to vent or w/e
Moderator: ericjon262
-
RoughKitty
- Posts: 47
- Joined: Tue Aug 01, 2006 4:39 pm
- Location: CR, Iowa
-
Dirty Sanchez
- Posts: 490
- Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2005 11:02 am
- Location: Orlando, Florida
Sorry to hear about your Father. I'm sure he never felt any pain from what you descrive and he is in a better place now. As for him not leaving a will, that sucks. Make sure you freeze whatever accounts he had till you can settle things with your step-mom. This will also give her an incentive to settle and not let her steal you blind.
As for your ex, get over him. It's a good thing you found out about him now and not later. It sounds like this guy is a player and he would never change his stripes. The kid is probably his and I bet the other woman will try to get him to support her and his child when it is born. As for all the nice thing he said to you, they are meaningless, because his actions speak louder than words. It's easy to lie to a woman and tell her that you love her when you want to get inside her pants.
With love come risks, you have to know what you are willing to risk in a relationship. You should also wait till you are done with school and have a career started before you really get into a serious relationship.
Chin up and good luck.
As for your ex, get over him. It's a good thing you found out about him now and not later. It sounds like this guy is a player and he would never change his stripes. The kid is probably his and I bet the other woman will try to get him to support her and his child when it is born. As for all the nice thing he said to you, they are meaningless, because his actions speak louder than words. It's easy to lie to a woman and tell her that you love her when you want to get inside her pants.
With love come risks, you have to know what you are willing to risk in a relationship. You should also wait till you are done with school and have a career started before you really get into a serious relationship.
Chin up and good luck.
I treat others as they treat me
I'll bite.
To lose your father at such a young age is a shaping event on your life, without question. To have the quality of your mourning to be soured by fights over money with tour step mom is really messing with your grieving process, cheapening it by putting a price on the loss of your dad.
In addition, you are grieving the end of a relationship. A relationship that sounds like at one time was of a loving and mutually pleasurable nature. But you're young. He's young. I'm not making apologies for the dude, but I'm also not ready to lynch the kid. But were you ready to be that one who might be expecting his baby? You dodged a bullet. He knows he made a mistake, I'm sure. But your anger at him isn't helping in his situation with the one that he's made the decision to man up up and be a live-in baby-daddy (which is the right thing to do). And as long as you keep pining for him, you'll always be that willing booty call in her mind. You can't force other people to live according to your agenda, so if he's made his decision to be with this other girl, then remember the good times you had and say goodbye. You'll be happier for it, as I'm sure will be the male population of Iowa.
The universe sends us pressures to mold us, to change us for whatever purpose. How you react to these pressures can have consequences or benefits in your life, your results may vary with use. You can cave in to it, allowing the seeming insurmountability of the moment cause you to wonder down the wrong path. Or, you can say "Bring the pain." Find a place of strength, something that is healthy for you, and tie yourself to the mast and let the storms rip past you. In the clarity of hindsight, you may learn what lessons you're being taught now.
Peace.
To lose your father at such a young age is a shaping event on your life, without question. To have the quality of your mourning to be soured by fights over money with tour step mom is really messing with your grieving process, cheapening it by putting a price on the loss of your dad.
In addition, you are grieving the end of a relationship. A relationship that sounds like at one time was of a loving and mutually pleasurable nature. But you're young. He's young. I'm not making apologies for the dude, but I'm also not ready to lynch the kid. But were you ready to be that one who might be expecting his baby? You dodged a bullet. He knows he made a mistake, I'm sure. But your anger at him isn't helping in his situation with the one that he's made the decision to man up up and be a live-in baby-daddy (which is the right thing to do). And as long as you keep pining for him, you'll always be that willing booty call in her mind. You can't force other people to live according to your agenda, so if he's made his decision to be with this other girl, then remember the good times you had and say goodbye. You'll be happier for it, as I'm sure will be the male population of Iowa.
The universe sends us pressures to mold us, to change us for whatever purpose. How you react to these pressures can have consequences or benefits in your life, your results may vary with use. You can cave in to it, allowing the seeming insurmountability of the moment cause you to wonder down the wrong path. Or, you can say "Bring the pain." Find a place of strength, something that is healthy for you, and tie yourself to the mast and let the storms rip past you. In the clarity of hindsight, you may learn what lessons you're being taught now.
Peace.
My Fiero is now a Finale. The end.